FEED MY SHEEP, DANGIT!

So, one of the elders in our ward gave a talk this week. He's just a new guy, making his way along with talk giving and Italian speaking. But he said something very simple that hit me in the spiritual gut: when we decide to serve a mission, we spend two years not serving ourselves, but serving others.

While I've been out, I've told myself it is for others, but I've still been thinking a whole lot about ME. About how I'm doing. About how I'm doing good, about how I'm doing bad. About how I'm not as happy as I want to be, or this situation isn't as perfect as I want it to be, or if I was in charge, I would want to try and do it this way. In other words, I've been still making this time (supposed to be for others) more about myself. Heh. Heh heh, whoopsy!

I mean, sure, I may not want to be where I am. But I decided ahead of time that this time was for my fellow fellows. For these dear Italians. Matthew says, "For even the Son of Man came not to be served, but to serve" (matt 20:28). I'm going to do what I can, what is in my power, to help these people. Yes, I can unilaterly decide to help people because I'm a DO GOODER. Ha ha. Yep. Talkin' about Jesus is always good when you're shoving it down people's throats. JUST KIDDING.

OTHER GREAT LESSON THIS WEEK: STOP JUDGING BECAUSE IT HURTS PEOPLE. We went and visited a member who has been open to us visiting her, but has been incredibly, incredibly busy. We finally were able to stop by. We'd been preparing for this spiritual thought for weeks (mostly because it kept getting rescheduled), but I always felt I didn't know exactly what to say to this sister. When we arrived, we started giving our spiritual thought, and then we realized... that this sister just needed to be listened to more than anything. She talked about how she was struggling coming to church. About how she wants to come to church -- how she REALLY REALLY wants to come, but she has these psychological obstacles that no one acknowledges. They tell her to suck it up and come to church anyway. And she says, I want to come, I do! But when I have these psychological problems holding me back, what do you want from me? Do you want me to go to a shrink who, not being Mormon, would just tell me to leave this church if it's causing me so much stress? Do you want me to come and be miserable because I know you're all talking about how I shouldn't be acting this way?

This sister has common Mormon problems... perfectionism, overworked, and facing constant comparison. And her desire to be a participating member is real. But she is currently facing hurdles. And I know that I am often one to judge. "Suck it up. Do it anyway." But what if I could instead help her work through her problems? Listen to her. Encourage her. Help her figure out her problem while in the framework in the church, instead of saying, "Either you're with us and willing, or you're against us." 

No one is going to be in the perfect, no matter what religion they are. So. Stop judging! And help people with their problems! It's not easy to have problems. "And we all need somebody to lean on!"

This upcoming week we're going to give a presentation at a university about DA MORMONS! Whoa/scary/weird! Say a prayer that we won't have hecklers! And that all these YOUNG PEOPLE will see that religion is COOL and HELPS US live HAPPIER lives!

Best moment of the week? When I showed the stake patriarch my new scripture coding system and we spent 20 minutes after church giggling over Isaiah. Or I was giggling. He was mostly giving me helpful insights into the layered prophecies of Isaiah.

We're designing a new tshirt! It's going to have a bird on it saying "Libertà" (Liberty -- that's the name of our ward) and the scripture that says "Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is Liberty." Oh yeah. If you have any other cool stenil ideas/fonts SEND THEM TO ME! I'm design STARVED!

Shoutout to David Ruvalcaba! I'm going to try and resend that letter that should have gotten to you months ago. Sorry about that...

Okay, I think that's all for now!

Bari out!

Sister Fuller

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